Time and Memory
Gregory Benford observes in his book Deep Time:
It is commonplace to note that the years flicker by faster as we age. Certainly a new year can have less impact when we have many more stacked behind us. I suspect the sameness of the later years also alters our reading of them. We settle into habits, and the days have fewer distinctions to mark their passing. We slide forward on skids greased by routine.
Little wonder, then, that we have a keener sense of the endless centuries behind us as our expected lifetimes approach a century. To a baby, a year is like a lifetime because it is his lifetime, so far. By age ten, clocks tick on at an apparent rate ten times faster than the baby’s sense; the next year is only a ten percent increase in his store of years. At fifty, time ticks on five times faster still. At a hundred, the differential rate is a hundred times the baby’s.
. . .
Imagine living to a thousand; then a year would have the impact of a few hours in a baby’s life.
Too much sameness, habit, and routine without distinction do make the time pass more quickly. Boredom is an excellent way to wipe out and waste enormous swaths of potentially memorable life. But I would rather have the slow differential of childhood, which gave me piles of vivid but inconsequential memories, over the accelerating clip of adult life, where I seem to be paying so little attention that time passes before I bother to make memories at all. Time without memory might as well be nonexistence or death. Socrates said that the unexamined life is not worth living, while Jesus observed that the “kingdom of heaven” is only available to those who change and become like children, and Buddhists urge mindfulness on the path to liberation and enlightenment.
So when my wife, this morning in bed, reminded me that today we have been married for one month, it occurred to me that here is an occasion to think about time and memory. We have memories of a month—from our wedding, through the week of our honeymoon, in struggling to return to our jobs, and then? The sameness and habit and routine of work challenges my ability to examine my life, to be like a child, and remain mindful, to make memories. But the months will pass, become years, and there is no going backward.
People say, “You are only as old as you feel.” And I think feeling old must mean feeling that time is passing too quickly. But time is always the same and we are what change. My wife and I are glad to have a month of married memories. I hope we make the next month even more alive than the last.
This is where I say, “Welcome to the real world,” in a way that sounds like I’m trying to be nice but reads as about the most condescending thing ever. *wink, wink*
But in all seriousness, great thoughts. Like everything pertaining to life, life itself is a labor. We have to work at it and shape it to what we want it to be; play god if you will.
Or do you mean, “Welcome to the desert of the real”?
Great thought’s Peter. I urge you to work to remember them. Covet your time away from work. I know your business can consume both you and your time, so please keep it your highest priority to take time both for yourself and together with Mary creating a new life together.
In the words of the immortal bard, Michael Wall:
Savor the Flavor
It’s more than fine
To save a wine
For a very Special Day
But it’s just as grand
To change the plan
And pop the cork for Tuesday
From “Any Given Sunday”
“Life is a game of inches. So is football. In either game the margin of error is small. One half a step too late or too early and you don’t quite make it.
But the inches we need are everywhere around us. In every minute of our lives. We have to go for every inch. Because we know that when we add up those inches, that will make the difference between winning and losing.
And I know that if I’m gonna have any life anymore, it’s because I’m still willing to go for that inch.
And that’s what living is. The six inches in front of your face.
Now what are you gonna do?”
Saw this speech from this movie the other day and reading your post reminded me of it. Although I would exchange “inches” for moments – life is a game of moments – and I don’t necessarily agree with ‘winning and losing’ analogies for life but overall, I like the idea of making the most of every moment I can and the willingness to do so.